My grandad had a hacksaw with teeth just like a shark,
I put it in my backpack when we visited the park.
I threw it in the pond but the hacksaw didn’t swim,
It had teeth like a shark but it didn’t have the fins.
My grandad had false teeth as straight as piano keys,
I hid them in the freezer before he went overseas.
I hit them with a hammer, the smash was blunt and loud,
They looked, to me, like piano keys but they made a different sound.
My grandad had a goldfish as orange as the fruit,
I took it for a walk outside in some water in a boot.
I put it in the blender but it wasn’t any use,
I couldn’t match the orange flavour making goldfish juice.
My grandad had a Corvette that flew just like the breeze,
I opened up the petrol cap and clogged the tank with leaves.
I feared I’d finally crossed the line, I thought, This time I’m dead,
But Grandad bought me a remote control car and said, “Break this one instead.”
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