Short Fiction, Poetry and Classic Book Reviews
"Well, what can you say about Uncle Bert that wouldn't further tarnish his reputation? He was a good man, I suppose. Not in the traditional sense of the word, but perhaps in comparison with some of his 'business associates', none of whom have turned up today to pay their respects, I see. Although, to be... Continue Reading →
Old John Burrow died last week. I remember when he arrived in our small town back in 1979, completely hairless and wearing a strange, one-piece outfit. The outfit looked like it was made of silk. Everybody said it was silk. It wasn't. I knew it wasn't. He spoke with an unusual accent, and kind of... Continue Reading →
Tinseltown was abuzz yesterday as crowds of hopefuls lined the streets for a shot at stardom. In an unprecedented gamble, a major movie studio announced open calls for the lead role in its new, six hundred million dollar project, Immaculate Termination. Head of Narcissus Studios, Martin Ahab, believes the approach will generate a wider interest... Continue Reading →
When I was a child I loved going to Mr Herbert's music shop. It was filled with the most wonderful sounds. Saturday mornings I would go with my sister and ask Mr Herbert to show us a new instrument. He would play for us and then let us have a turn. Or he would just... Continue Reading →
"I count myself privileged to have introduced my best mate Phil and his new bride Stephanie nearly three years ago. Steph and I actually met while working together at IBM. I was there briefly as a lawnmowing consultant, and she had just been promoted to Chief Coroner in the laptops department. She was a real... Continue Reading →
The baseball world is today mourning the loss of Joseph "Raging Joe" Williams. The former Atlanta Braves star died peacefully in his home yesterday, aged seventy-three. He is survived by his wife, Marsha. In today's sporting landscape, where loyalty is traded for multi-million-dollar paychecks, where political activism grabs more headlines than on-field performance, and where... Continue Reading →
It was a hot August night in Osaka. Mossy, myself and the rest of the band were back at the hotel room. Normally after a gig the room would be an orgy of drinking, feasting, dancing, sword fights, amateur dental surgery, impromptu taxidermy and half-naked circus folk, more often than not resulting in the arrest... Continue Reading →
It was my first overseas trip on official duty. I had been called up at the last minute to act as the Prime Minister's key adviser in Western Africa. In Senegal, after a warm welcome and sightseeing tour, things cooled at the negotiating table. Both leaders, usually calm under pressure, began shouting and slamming their... Continue Reading →
Advertising was in my blood. A rare strain of zombie virus was too, but mostly advertising. I remember it was a Wednesday—the usual mayhem—I had deadlines to meet, clients to schmooze, and anti-human-flesh-eating-urge medication to take—and in walked Martin Milford, president of Milford's Mayonnaise. He had come to hear our pitch for his company's latest... Continue Reading →
