Short Fiction: The Advertising Business

Advertising was in my blood. A rare strain of zombie virus was too, but mostly advertising. I remember it was a Wednesday—the usual mayhem—I had deadlines to meet, clients to schmooze, and anti-human-flesh-eating-urge medication to take—and in walked Martin Milford, president of Milford's Mayonnaise. He had come to hear our pitch for his company's latest... Continue Reading →

The Curse of Gary (Part 7)

Victor stopped laughing. It seemed Dave was serious. "Wait," said Victor. "What are you saying?" Dave looked about the store; no one else was there. He put his hands on the counter and leaned forward. "No one talks about it much anymore. It's a big old mess that's never gettin' cleaned up. It's just better... Continue Reading →

The Curse of Gary (Part 1)

Victor Furbank grew up in a thrifty household. "Waste not, want not," was one of the family mottos, and Victor's father was as stern as a boat's backside when it came to enforcing it. The cost of any excess butter Victor spread on his toast was deducted from his weekly pocket money (which was already... Continue Reading →

Poem: Mouldy Orange

Once glory of the fruit bowl, In your youth you were the crowning jewel, But too many times passed over, Withered your rind, embittered your juice.   Bananas went before you, Apples, passionfruit and even a pear, And you were left behind, A snack unchosen, moulding in despair.   Eyes drawn to your beauty, Now... Continue Reading →

Poem: The Siege of Devil’s Pass

Way down south a long time ago, When folks were content and life moved slow, Was a place where a cactus wouldn't dare grow, And they called it Devil's Pass.   Few people knew and even less cared, That out on that land where the ground was bare, A iron-willed family had built a house... Continue Reading →

Drum and the Pirates (The Final Part)

"There's a pirate coming up the stairs," said Daz. "He's got a machine gun! Thirty seconds to contact!" "What are we going to do?" said Andy. "I can't stop a machine gun." Cam snapped his fingers. "Human Voltron," he said. "What?" said Andy. "Well, you can't stop a machine gun. Neither can I." "But together..."... Continue Reading →

Drum and the Pirates (Part 8)

If the other pirates were not alert to Drum's presence before, that grenade blast gave them the heads up. Drum knew he didn't have much time. He snuck alongside a tall platform at the ship's edge, and hurried along a narrow passage where a single steel guardrail was the only thing between him and a... Continue Reading →

Drum and the Pirates (Part 7)

Drum made a quick detour to the men's room. If video games had taught him anything, it was that enemies become more difficult to defeat the further you progress. Now just three foes stood between him and the final boss, Randy Van Funk, and he didn't want to face them with the added pressure of... Continue Reading →

Drum and the Pirates (Part 6)

Drum continued along the deck. He glanced around a corner and saw two pirates leaning against a shipping container, smoking a joint. They were Fluorescent Android's percussionist, Ziggy Krisp, and keytarist, Ramesh Cohen. Drum climbed up onto the container and moved with ninja stealth out above them. He took a small woodpecker from his sock,... Continue Reading →

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