Election 2024 (The Final Part)

There were no holds barred in the first debate between Todd Alderman and Inzamam Guevara. Alderman grilled Guevara about certain recent remarks he made. He was quoted as saying: "Anyone who supports Todd Alderman is sub-human. I would have no qualms literally incinerating such vermin. I mean that." Guevara insisted the comments were taken out... Continue Reading →

Election 2024 (Part 5)

The two presidential candidates were now chosen: in the red corner was Todd Alderman, and in the blue corner was Inzamam "Hotsauce" Guevara. The battle began. With both men drawing from seemingly bottomless campaign funds, voters were bombarded with advertising. Guevara introduced America to what he called "Cool Socialism", running television ads featuring big-name celebrities... Continue Reading →

Election 2024 (Part 4)

The third Democratic debate was a sellout—thanks to Inzamam Guevara. The person formerly known as Martin Guest had only revealed his new identity the previous day, yet he was already a superstar. His Twitter handle, @hotsauceguevara, had attracted seventy-three million followers overnight. He had also been awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. Aside from its political... Continue Reading →

Election 2024 (Part 3)

For ten days no one saw or heard from Martin Guest. They were ten days Layla Jackson used to her advantage. Riding the momentum from her crushing victory in the second debate, she appeared everywhere—television, radio, billboards, Twitter—promoting her "Enviro-Socialist" agenda. With a focus on equal distribution of wealth, equal distribution of climate, and equal... Continue Reading →

Election 2024 (Part 2)

With Aurora Beedler out of the equation, Layla Jackson took over as front runner in the race for the Democratic nomination. She was always going to be hard to beat: a bright, African American-Latina woman, she was a media darling. Martin Guest on the other hand had an uphill battle. Despite his best efforts to... Continue Reading →

Election 2024 (Part 1)

The 2024 U.S. presidential race was the most dramatic in living memory. Hard-fought, controversial, and constantly entertaining, it was the roller-coaster ride that brought American politics into the post-Trump era. This piece will look at the eighteen months leading up to the election, and analyse the key events that brought about its extraordinary outcome. Back... Continue Reading →

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